Welcome our #SurvivorSunday feature, Shelby. As fearless as she is stunning, Shelby has very recently decided to break her silence in the hopes of freeing herself and helping others who may be in the same situation. We applaud her resilience and thank her for sharing this heartfelt testimony.

Shelby’s Story:

As our anniversary approaches I have found myself more hostile in the way I communicate with people. I’m more defensive and low key (high key) STILL hurt and pissed off at myself for allowing it to go on for as long as I did. I still wonder what I did wrong. Was I not pretty enough? Did I talk too much? Why did he hate me so much? Why did he cheat on me all the time? Why did he talk to me like trash? But now I know why.  It was because HE has the problem. Not me. Am I still hurt, of course. But I know it wasn’t my fault.

It started literally the day we got married.

I was cheated on while I went to the commissary to get food for dinner. I was pushed into a door where the knob left a bruise on my back. Months later he left for deployment. We were separated and I gave up my dream of joining the military to come back and give him a chance. Time went on until eventually, on April fools day, I found out I was with child. I was excited but he was not. He cheated on me later that night. When I confronted him, I was punched seven times in my back and bitten as well. Just for him to turn around and say he was sorry. I believed him; confusing sympathy with manipulation. The honeymoon phase began. For a little while things were okay and then one day (once again) I saw him texting another woman.  I confronted him.  Another mistake.  It started with yelling and my belongings being thrown out the window.  I called him a liar and at 5 months pregnant, I was punched square in my face. It left me with a broken, bloody nose and 2 black eyes. I couldn’t even leave the house unless I covered my face. He would watch me put on make up to go to the store but my phone had to remain at home.

Again, the honeymoon phase started.  A few months would go by but instead of hitting me, it turned into calling me fat, a whale, etc.  Meanwhile, I was pregnant with his son and he was messing around making ME feel insecure at a time he should of have been more SUPPORTIVE than ever. A few foot rubs later and the birth of our son and things were okay for a while. We went to his new duty station and I got pregnant with our daughter. He was kicked out of the military and the fights began again. I was pushed against the wall the day before our diaper shower. When our daughter was 3 weeks old, he left me with two children and nothing to my name. A year went by and I gained my confidence back but somehow I let him convince me that he had changed. Everything was okay for a month and then the fighting started again. The last incident left me with bite marks and bruises everywhere. Telling me HE NEVER WANTED OUR KIDS.  Shoving fingers into my mouth where my wisdom teeth had just been removed and more. I tried to defend myself and he had audacity to call the cops and try to put me in jail for pushing him off of me.  He tried to make me look like I was crazy.

Now, here I am…

To everyone who sent money to me so I could get here, thank you. If it wasn’t for all of you, my kids and I wouldn’t be here.  Now I’m back in this situation of living with friends to get on my feet. No child support but in all honesty I don’t even care if he sends a dime anymore. I will somehow make it. My kids deserve someone who actually calls, won’t frighten them, and will love them.  I can and l will do this. I got out and you can too.  You are beautiful. You are important. You DESERVE BETTER.  If I can do this, you can too. Thank you again to everyone who helps in every way you can. Even if it’s just a hug.  I have lost so many friends and family members but many have remained and I have gained much more.

Freedom.