by Elly Belle, SELF:

This is often the hardest work for survivors of domestic violence and other forms of abuse to do—because trauma can cause victims to feel distant from and untrusting of others, and can also cause them to avoid intimacy. “Lots of survivors ask questions about how to know if something’s really a red flag or if their trauma brain is being triggered, and the only good answer to that question is practice,” Sahana Prasad, AM, LLMSW, a Michigan-based trauma therapist, tells SELF. “We have to learn those relational skills in a safe and supportive environment. We heal through relationships, even if our trauma tells us we have to isolate.”